April 4, 2008
Ended up ovulating the day after I wrote the last post, and am now on my second period since little Evan passed away. *Bawl* I miss Evan, miss you sooooooooooo much little one.
So much sad. Sad won’t stop.
We had our first appointment with the reproductive mental health clinic I waited 3 months to get..they basically told me I am doing very well and they don’t feel they will be of much use to me, as I am mourning in a healthy way. As they say, only time can heal my wounds, not therapy…..and so they reffered me for grief counselling and the loss support group. Not crazy enough for therapy girl..I must be so strong, oh my! Whatever, I don’t freaking want to be strong, I am sick of being strong, I am sick of being dealt bullshit hand after bullshit hand. I just want my baby back please.
Learning to drive is hard and stressful, having your husband as your teacher is not an easy feat either, but I am getting a bit better each time. I am so scared and fearful.
May 3, 2008 at 1:59 pm
I cannot even begin to tell you how much I can relate to how you are feeling. I lost my twins last month and I am sick and tired of being ’strong’. Maya and Leah passed away when I was 24 weeks and I was a wreck. People told me to be strong and I will get through it. I am sick of pretending that everything is OK. All I want is to hold my girls and to *tear* see them grow. It is nice to know that other people know what I am going through. (even though it sucks terribly) Cry girl, just let it out.
May 4, 2008 at 9:42 pm
So sorry Kellie! I am sorry you lost your twins that breaks my heart.